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old wounds being bumped 2007-12-04 4 10:03 p.m. how do you tell people when they're bumping into old emotional wounds that they didn't create? how do you fess up that you're aware your reaction is totally disproportionate to the actual situation but that you can't control it because it wells up from a place of deep dark pain which has never quite healed? i feel like it entails a depth of honesty and openness and vulnerability i just don't know i'm capable of. so please... don't promise me things - it cuts at a place that heard lots of them but never saw any of them followed thru. don't give me maybe's - it gets my hopes up, only to have them crash and burn a fiery death when a maybe becomes a no. and unfortunately - don't give me a little, because i'll end up wanting it all, and if - no when - you can't give it all, i'll feel lost. my sense of disappointment is keen, even though i've spent years trying to squash it, pretend it isn't as strong as it is. but i feel it to my core every time i get let down. every time. and it's not your fault. and i know it. but it doesn't stop the pain. previous - next